The Dreaded Christmas List

I love the holidays. I love this time of year (minus the weather) with Thanksgiving and Christmas and family get togethers. Hot chocolate and cozy fires and the lights and decorations for the season. Not to mention the food. Fooooood! It always goes by faster than I want it to. This year I'm taking two whole weeks of vacation and I'm really looking forward to this last stretch of time off before the baby is here.

There is one thing though that I always put off because I can't stand doing it. My Christmas List. Remember when you were a kid and the list was a mile long and you had endless ideas of what to add to it? Anything you saw on TV was cool and whatever your friends were asking for you also had to have. Then you became a teenager and the list either became UBER particular or was all clothes, because it was the only time of the year you could ask for brand name jeans (No? Just me?). Now as an adult I still have parents, in-laws, friends, extended family etc. asking me what I'd like but I'm stuck on what to tell them. Honestly, if the item isn't too expensive I'll just go out and get what I need for myself. If it's really expensive, I'll save up and get it later. I don't expect my family and friends (besides my husband, he still gets to throw down money on me) to buy me anything that's pricey. So I sit there, every year without fail, surfing the Internet trying to come up with ideas for things I could possibly want that I didn't know I wanted. Here is how the making of the list normally goes:

1. Add on random household items we've been too lazy to purchase on our own or have broken and not replaced yet.
2. Try to think of all the jewelry, purses, random girly things I've seen my friends or co-workers with that I've thought were cute.
3. Delete random household items because those are boring to buy and receive and I'll just purchase them for myself later. Maybe. Probably not.
4. Look at incredibly generalized top 100 gift giving lists online for inspiration. Realize they are not inspiring at all.
5. Ask hubby for ideas for myself. Get frustrated when he can't write my list for me. Isn't he supposed to KNOW ME more than I know myself?
6. Add items that don't actually fit me or my personality because I can change, I will wear more makeup, I will dress nicer, I will be a new me next year.
7. Add things I really do want but that are expensive and then feel guilty asking for them, so remove them right away.
8. Send out list to everyone and sigh because I've put way too much thought into it and I don't really know if I really want the items on it or not anymore.

Thus commences the making of the Christmas List. Just in time for the New Year's Resolution List (of fail).

26.5

I don't really mean to be turning this into a pregnancy/mommy blogger type blog but when life hands you lemons...

I'm almost 27 weeks. I can't explain the time warp continuum fast/slow movement that is going on but it's all flying by me so fast and yet, can you believe I still have a whole trimester to go yet? (I keep trying to write semester, seriously, every time). Like, there should be at least 10 weeks at the very earliest before I want this little guy here? Then again, ahhhhhhh, don't come yet we still have so much we need to buy, and fix around the house and places we need to go and all. the. things. we need to do. The baby shower is in 22 days. I'm thinking after that whole shindig I'll be feeling a bit better in the what I need to buy department. Stay tuned.

In other pregnancy news, it's crazy how much I can feel him move now versus when I thought I was feeling him jump around lots a month ago. Occasionally he'll hit an organ and it's actually uncomfortable. While I sit at work or at home I can watch my stomach jump around out of my peripheral vision. I grab hubby's hand as many times as I can during the evenings and weekends because I want him to see just how active he is. Can you believe how much your son is beating me up already? Plus it's not just kicks I'm feeling. I'm not sure if he's stretching or pushing out or what, but I'll feel this extreme pressure in some part of my stomach and I can feel with my hands a hard lump in that area. If he's feeling cramped now, just wait little guy for what you have to deal with later. That's not a threat, just, a warning I guess. A while ago I was feeling him flip, which was like the feeling you get when you are on a roller coaster and about to lose your lunch, minus the actual lunch losing part. I'm looking forward to and worried about the next time I feel that.

I know I won't do it justice explaining it but you can't believe how special all these ordinary things really are. Very much day by day normal but memories in the making as well. I am feeling my son MOVE. Before I ever see him and meet him, I know his patterns. I will know him longer than anyone else on this world will. It's a comforting little jab here and thump there. "Hi baby!", I'll say when we are having a little moment together. Each time it starts up it's a reassurance he's just as he should be, healthy and growing. It's our own special communication, baby morse code style. Sharing my body with someone at first really freaked me out and if I think really hard on it, still kind of does. I mean, there's another HUMAN INSIDE ME. Living! But at the same time, how crazy, awesome, cool is it that my body is producing a child. A very complicated process it just knows how to take care of on it's own, without me telling it what to do. A week or two ago I had a day where I really wasn't feeling much movement. It was light and then not there for a long time. Fear grew in my heart in a matter of minutes. Was something wrong? How can I care so much for this person I've never met yet? I was about to the point of tears and called the midwife to see what I should do. (Of course as it always seems to happen for me, as soon as I hung up after leaving a message I started to feel quite the series of kicks). Those kicks become more and more important to me each day. I can't even imagine what it will be like in another month. And having a whole child to take care of my very own. WHOA.

Let me moan about my problems to you for a bit, k?

So here I am folks, just over the halfway mark. 23 weeks. It's been a pretty good ride so far but I'm starting to see how that could change. I know I'm pretty lucky so far and I've been trying not to complain...but...okay I'm going to complain a little bit. Feel free to skip this entry.

First off, sleep. I think it's so unfair how sleep starts to suck so much when you are pregnant. I hate hearing how it's "nature's way to get you ready". Seriously? I think it should work the other way around, it's your last chance to get good, uninterrupted sleep. It seems rather cruel to start now. I need some reserves to be able to handle the first few weeks with a newborn. Mainly my problem is not actually getting to sleep, it's staying asleep and comfortable. My hips have been starting to hurt after 30 minutes to and hour on one side, so I need to flip. Then also factor in having to pee two or three times during the night. Yup, pretty sure I'm up once an hour, most nights. I miss sleeping on my stomach and I'm past the point where it is okay to sleep on your back. Too bad I'm not a night owl and my work day starts at 7.

Then there's my gallbladder. I know this isn't something that most women have issues with during pregnancy, but it's easy for it to start acting up because of how progesterone slows everything in your system down. It aches and stings each time I eat or drink something other than water. If it gets really bad I'll get to have it out after the baby is born. I hope it doesn't end that way though. I started to feel the dull ache about 3 or 4 weeks ago under my right breast, sort of in my rib area. I also noticed I was having pain under my shoulder blade in a really strange location, but I didn't link the two together. Actually, I spent weeks at work thinking I was sitting funny and tried moving my monitors and chair around to be more ergonomic. Turns out you can just feel the pain in both locations. Lovely. Personally, I'd rather have the ache in my back. It seems somehow more tolerable that way. I guess I shouldn't be too surprised as my mother has had hers out and it seems to run in the family but couldn't it have waited until another person wasn't occupying my insides?

Really though, those are my two biggest complaints. I can still walk pretty fast. I'm not waddling yet. A few of my non-maternity shirts I can still stretch to cover me. I did just realize last week my winter coat can't close anymore, so I'm not sure what I'm going to do about that one, but overall everything is going swimmingly. I need to count my blessings! I feel better now after a nice complaining sesh. Thanks for listening to my baby babble. If you've made it this far, a pat on the back to you!

Announcement

I have an announcement. It's the reason I haven't been writing lately because I wasn't sure what to write about without writing about, well, it. I've had a lot on my brain lately and who knows who reads this darn thing, so I've stayed quiet. Confused? Me too. Well, I'm pregnant! 14 weeks! It's been going by fast and slow at the same time. Fast because, holy cow I'm starting my second trimester! I'm 1/3 done! And slow, because each and every day after I found out I was pregnant, I was worried I'd lose the baby. I think those fears are starting to go away now that I'm past the 3 month mark. What's funny, is if I had had a baby when I was younger I don't think I would have those same fears. It's just after watching friends and family go through miscarriages that I've started to fear it. Anyway, enough about fears, this is a happy time and I want to make sure to capture the weirdness that is my pregnancy!

Of course, because I'm a bit of a planner I have approximately a billion pregnancy and baby related books at home I've been reading through over the last 8 or so months. So many of them tell you that they will let you in on all the secret, never been written about before details and then, shocker, it's just like every other book. (Side note: My favorite book so far as been "Do Chocolate Lovers Have Sweeter Babies?: The Surprising Science of Pregnancy" by Jena Pincott.) For the most part they say all the same things with varying degrees of detail. Now for my own version! BEWARE: these are probably details you have had happen to you or already know about...but I will still subject you to reading them again!

So, some things I've noticed since I've gotten pregnant:

• My belly button is getting bigger. It's not becoming an outie or anything yet, at only 14 weeks, but it is like the inside of it is widening. I thought it was maybe just me that was able to notice it or, you know, making it up in my head (not uncommon for me) but my husband mentioned he noticed it the other night too. WEIRD. But convenient for cleaning.
• Besides all the strange crampy type feelings I'm getting as my uterus expands to fit my child, it also feels like I'm carrying a water balloon in my lower pelvis. I'm really not sure how to describe that any better. It's just a feeling down there I've never had before. Something is DOWN THERE.
• I feel like a teenager all over again. No, I was not pregnant as a teen, just more of that "I don't know my own body" feeling.WHO ARE YOU BODY?! 
• I'm thirsty all the time and I want juice. Big glasses of orange juice in the morning. CranApple in the afternoon. Water, I must have water!

I'm sure more weirdness will come in the future but that's what I have for now. I haven't really experienced all the book symptoms (heartburn, being tired, throwing up, crazy emotions, etc.) so we'll see what the future brings! 181 days to go!

Here are some pictures to look at...so let's pretend I haven't been gone so long!

So uh...hi there! I've been busy. And sort of ignoring my blog. I've actually opened it several times, created a few posts and then decided I didn't like them, so I never hit publish. Life has been rolling right along. Trips to family in Ohio, twice actually. Fourth of July and visiting with out of town family. Trip to Pennsylvania. Vacations. Work. We've been on the move. Please accept my apologies in not writing. Or don't. I suppose I can't really make you.

I'm sorry I actually don't have a topic to cover today as I need to leave in 10 minutes (life, it just won't slow down) but I wanted to say doooonnn't leeeeeave meeeeeee! And! Here are some pictures to keep you around for a little while longer. Until I update again. Soon (date to be determined).

Cat naps on a Saturday

Downtown Pittsburgh

Lovebirds nesting while visiting Saugatuck

Pure Michigan

I'll be back soon with lots of fun updates and news and hopefully a much longer post! Stay tuned!

My first Birchbox is here!

As an anniversary gift, my husband bought me a 3 month subscription for Birchbox. Which, if you've never heard of it, is a cute little box of goodies and products based off a little survey of what you like and dislike that is sent to your house every month. You can then review them for points which can earn you free things. For my hubby's birthday earlier this year, I had bought him a men's 3 month subscription. It was filled with colognes, shaving products, lotions, etc. One month he even got a little speaker for his phone made out of olive tree wood.

We returned from our mini-vacay in Saugatuck yesterday (entry coming later) to find it waiting for me. I couldn't wait to open it! While on the weekends I'm not a huge makeup girl, I do love me some pampering and sample products. Plus, pretty things!

So this is what I got this month:

1. Ruby Wing Color Changing Nail Polish by Peony. I absolutely love this color! My photo doesn't do it justice. It's a bright neon type orange that changes to a pink-ish coral neon in the sun. 

2. Simple Sensitive Skin Experts Revitalizing Eye Roll-On. A full size roll-on of cucumber extract and some other vitamins to reduce that puffiness you get under your eyes. Plus, it feels really nice going on as the roller ball is metal, so it's pretty cold going on your skin. (This one was the extra not on the card).

3. Skin & Co Roma Sicilian Body Gel. I haven't used it yet but it smells great!

4. Shu Uemura Essence Absolue Nourishing Protective Leave-In Oil. Again, as I just got the box yesterday, I haven't used this yet but I'm excited to try it. My hair could use a little TLC.

5. Juicy Couture La La perfume. I'm not a huge fan of perfume samples, which I let them know, but as this is my welcome box I'm betting it was sent before I had the time to fill out the survey to make them aware.

And there you have it! I think it's a great little gift to give or receive. Now I'm off to finish the last layer on my nails.

Edit: Adding my referral link if you are interested! Please let me know if you have any questions. http://birch.ly/12jbiTa 

Summer Plans

Well you guys, summer is upon us. Or, will be soon. June seems like it should be summer to me. I feel like it should be at least 70 degrees in Michigan right now. I'm not even that far north. But alas, it's a whole whopping 65 out right now. I actually do prefer cooler weather, and my favorite season is fall, but I want at least a mini summer experience before fall is here again. 72-75 degrees would be nice. Warm enough so that I can shut off my desk heater at work at least. Tank tops and shorts and flip flop weather, ya know?

Speaking of summer, the hubby and I have some plans for the upcoming months and I thought I'd share our first planned trip with you all.

For our 7th anniversary, we are headed to Saugatuck Michigan to enjoy a long weekend at a nice little B&B. Neither of us have been there before, or Holland for that matter, but we both enjoy the little downtown areas of Michigan, Lake Michigan and that general hippie/artsy/sailor-ish vibe that those types of locations ooze.

Pure Michigan: Saugatuck - check it out!

We plan to get there bright and early to take a roasting class at Uncommon Grounds. They offer several different types of classes, all 2 hours and 20 bucks per person. As my other half is a bit of a coffee snob and I enjoy the beautiful brown liquid (with much creamer) myself, it sounded like a fun thing to do to start our first morning off there. I like to support little coffee shops like that vs. big brand name places and I think it's great that they try to visit and get to know their farmers as well.

Not Uncommon Grounds, but delicious coffee
goodness none the less. Also, foodie Instagram photos!

We also plan to visit several restaurants in the area. This is a common thread on all our vacations. I'd say we probably spend more money of food vs. entertainment and souvenirs whenever we travel. Yes, I am that hipster foodie picture taker person. I will inflict you with multiple Instagram photos of our meals. I'm sorry...maybe. A couple of locations on our list to dine at are Salt of the Earth and Everyday People Cafe. These were suggested to us by the B&B owner so I will trust their judgement.

I will be doing a fair bit of reading during our visit too. (Any suggestions I can add to my list?) Had I planned better, I would have rented a small B&B cabin (which seems to be pretty popular in the area) and read on a cute little porch all day. However, as those were all sold out and/or I'm not willing to throw down a thousand dollars for a few days, I will either be reading in a cute little (and I do mean little) B&B bedroom or perhaps will stake out a location that I can call my own for a few hours downtown. Either way, I will enjoy it.

The count down is on! What are you doing this summer?

Thinking about making a change

Children are a blessing. So I've heard. However, they were not in the picture of my immediate future for a long time. My husband and I married young, on purpose. We were in love and contrary to what some might have believed, did not have a bun in the oven. This June we will be celebrating our seventh anniversary. It hardly seems possible. I've been with him for over a decade. Sometimes if feels to me as if it were just a few years ago we started dating. He's for sure, my best friend and wins the best hubby award too. I am still constantly bragging about him to everyone I know and I think the world of him. I am still so in love with him and excited to see him at the end of the day. I'm really proud of that too. Of our relationship and the things we've conquered together. We've really learned about communication and how each other works but still find out, even after seven years, there is always something new you can learn about a person. I attribute most of the good things I've done or had or been given in my life to him. It all has been perfect, in an imperfect world. I wouldn't take back a second of it.

So...children. Babies. When is the right time? This is a question we've struggled with for a while now. Why mix it up? Why change something that is just so perfect right now for the both of us? For at least five years, I don't think it was even in the picture for me. As in, I didn't allow myself to think about it because, COLLEGE and then WORK and then FUN (and I can finally afford it). It was just some off in the future thought like retirement. I would maybe say random comments about these far off future events such as, "When we have kids" and "I hope my kid does/says/is...". You get the idea. That's about as far as I really got in the whole process. I have some friends who have had children for almost as long as my marriage. I have some who have no children and don't plan to for a while. I know what both sides of the whole thing looks like. I've in theory known I wanted kids but not really, in actual real life.

Then, about six months ago, I started to feel like my days were on repeat. Not that I've seen the movie, but I was experiencing Groundhog's Day. Wake up, get ready for work, work, come home and take care of things and then go to bed. Rinse and repeat. I still love my life, don't get me wrong, but it almost felt pointless. Like, it's moving by faster each day and I need to slow down and be mindful of every moment. I need to do something bigger than me. I don't want to say it feels like something is missing, because I'm very happy with how things are now, but I wouldn't mind something new coming around either. For months now, I've been staring at pregnant women who walk by me and reading All. The. Things...articles and opinion pieces about pregnancy and children. I have stacks of books on various topics and I sometimes feel like I can't read enough. Like if I keep reading, I'll figure out some unknown secret to myself. Am I ready? Do I feel ready? What is ready, exactly? Is one ever really ready? Should I want this more? Should I plan even more? Do I really want to change such a good thing we've got going? How risky is it to wait a few more years? Etc. etc. etc.

The hubby and I came up with a date six months ago. We decided, this magical, golden date was when we would start trying. Both of us with a little hesitation, for probably different reasons. Since then, I've allowed myself to open up to this idea and feel like I've been completely obsessed with it ever since. I am pretty positive I've waaaay over-thought the whole thing and then worried about that a little more. I've talked it to death with a few friends and please nobody look up my Google history. I am trying to take all the perfect, planned out steps. I realize not everyone functions this way, but it works for me. I'm comforted by it because it's the only part of this whole thing that I have control over. I've been taking prenatals for a while, because that's what you are supposed to do. I recently had my preconception visit with my OBGYN, because that's what you are supposed to do. And the next step...the "trying" phase. A phase of life that on some days, I am so sure I want it I can see the chubby cute baby that I will tickle and kiss and admire its fat rolls. While still yet on other days, I hope I'm not cutting a really great phase of my life short. Of our life. I'm still excited though. We both are. The anticipation of the unknown. What a mix of emotions, already. I know the future will only bring more.

I'd be interested to hear where were you in life on this jumping off point, assuming you were planning it? What did ready feel like for you? Is anyone else really excited and terrified all at once? Was there a moment when you realized it was right? Just me? Tell me about it.

Randomness with a cherry on top

I have a feeling this is going to be a really random post. I just know it before I even start. I'm writing without a purpose but yet have a bunch of things I want to share. So I'm saying sorry right off. But really, I'm not sorry. So, sorry about that.

***

First off, looking at my audience on this blog is fun:

Apparently Canada and Russia dig me?

Not that I'm aiming for anyone in particular, but I suppose I thought the United States might at least show up on the map? Eh? Eh? Vodka anyone?

***

In other news, I've been hit with this strong desire to scan in my old photos and share them with others. They've been in a box, tucked away in my closet for years and now I neeeeed to have other people see them. Look at how cute we were! O.M.G., look at my tiny, non-existent tummy. And I thought I was chubby, good Lord. Can you BELIEVE our hair? Why would my mother do that to me? 

Bangs and a perm? Seriously mom, whyyyyyyy?

***

Today I have the plan to go look at some chairs for my living room with a friend. Chairs I've needed for about...four years now? Don't judge. I'm just a slow interior designer. I want it to look perfect. And I'm lazy. In June it will have been four years since we've moved into our house and while we have a couch we bought to fit the living room right away, we never got around to a couple of chairs to finish it off. I mean, I like the open look but it's a bit awkward when we have people over and they have to sit on the floor. It drives me batty and makes it feel all dorm room around here and I desperately want an adult living room. So I'm at least taking the first step in looking. Go me.

***

I've recently been trying to go gluten and dairy free. Not that I'm a celiac or lactose intolerant, but my body doesn't seem to like them. So of course, I love them. We are like two third grader best friends. I hate you, but hey, want to have as slumber party? Breadsticks and cheesy sauce? OKAY. I could survive on bread and cheese and oh, how I love my coffee creamer. We have a RELATIONSHIP. So it has been difficult. All, four days of it. I'm not planning a huge life change or anything. I'm not going all Gwyneth. I just want to see if it helps. I kind of hope it doesn't, but at the same time I hope it does. If I can stick to it. Jury is still out and don't get your hopes up is what I'm saying.

***

So the hubby and I went to Philly and NYC over the weekend. My first time to both places. I loved both, for different reasons. I really enjoy older architecture and the history of a city. Which is probably why I like Europe so much and you could feel that in bits and pieces of Philly. And New York, oh how I enjoy a big city. Choices, which I don't really have where I live, really attract me. Choices of places to eat and shop. Choices of entertainment and events going on every week. Diversity. Options. People watching. Places still open after 9 p.m.

Hotel room view

Sometimes I feel like we were meant to live in a big city, but picking up and leaving what you've known for most your life is hard. It's comfortable here. Safe. I know what to expect. But oh, the longing for what I don't have. Grass is always greener, I suppose.  

***

I need to go take a shower. I want to grab another cup of coffee (with my coconut milk french vanilla creamer). Furniture shopping is impending. Must Pinterest to get ideas. Wish me luck.

The Hair Cliffhanger Is Over

So uh...hi there? How's things been? Good for you? Good here too...so good I just haven't been bothered to post about it. You thought I was quitting, didn't you? Well, ha-ha! Not just yet. However, I regret to say I don't have a fabulous long update since I've been gone, but I've got something at least.

So lets see, the big hair decision, I believe that was the big (so not big) cliffhanger I left off on. Did I do it? Why, yes I did. In the end I figured I've thought about it enough, I might as well do it. (Or, told enough people that I'd feel stupid if I didn't go through with it). If I really hated it...well, then I would just remember this little life lesson I've learned. Happy to say, however, that I do quite like it. My hair stylist dyed my hair closer to its natural color and with those two changes, I feel like I could almost pass for a different person.

No?

Here...let's try another...

Maybe?

Well hey, I at least think I look different. And I like it. So there. I'm learning what to do with it now in the mornings. It takes approximately a bajillion less minutes to do, which I so love and I'm working on several different ways I can style it. I am officially part of the pixie club now. Does that come with a special ID card? Does anybody know?

In other breaking news, the hubby and I spent almost a week in Napa and it was fabulous! Much dining and wandering and buying of material things commenced. That'll have to be a post for another day though. Many pictures to come. I promise...if I get around it it.

And with that, I leave you hanging again. There is one last piece of my mom's apple pie left on the counter from Sunday and it's not just going to eat itself. 

Gossip

I grew up learning that gossip was a bad thing. It is not something to be proud of. I heard a lot about it in Sunday school and how it shouldn't be done. It is a sin. Yet, I grew up hearing all those same people and other "adults" in my life do it every day. I've heard various comments, "Oh, it's not gossip if you care about the person", or, "I'm not gossiping...but...". Everyone does it. Some, more than others. But what divides us up into the nosy neighbor category vs. just the average person? What amount of gossip is acceptable? Is it when a person starts judging actions and isn't just sharing a story? Is it only gossip after it repeats itself multiple times from the same person? What defines telling a story about someone vs. gossiping about them? Are we not to talk about other people, like, ever? Wouldn't that just make us self-centered and narcissistic? Isn't that bad too?

This is just my brain over-analyzing the topic. I bring this all up because I recently watched a fascinating TED talk about the sociology of gossip. (A little background here - I've been interested in sociology since I was FORCED to take a mandatory soc class in high school. I find other people really interesting. People watching is fun, seriously! (No, I'm not a creeper). Why people do what they do in a group or how people are affected by other people sucks me in. So, sociology of gossip? Heck yeah I'm going to watch it!

I really liked how the speaker pulled together the two topics. Now to be clear, she's talking celebrity gossip. Which I may or may not find myself reading every day...and I may or may not have several links saved as my favorites...and for some reason always feel a little bit guilty about reading...

Here, go watch for yourself! (It's a wee bit long, about 20 minutes, so I'll go grab a coffee and wait for you).

What did you think? I'm curious to know. The folks I'm around every day (the husband) mostly find celebrity gossip pointless. They'll say it's mush or all fake. (However, even if it IS all fake, if I'm entertained, what's the difference from reading a fictional novel?) Buttt, here's the thing, I'm pretty sure it's not all fake. Pictures of people in certain places are points in their life that are actually happening. Princess Kate and Jessica Simpson are both having babies. Really! That's not fake. And I'm reading and looking at everything I can get my hands on about it. This video just hits home for me though. WHY am I interested in celebrity babies? What is so fascinating about females and their actions in society? Why am I drawn to reality tv, even when I know it's not real reality? This is totally a bigger thing that I hadn't realized I was doing...and this video made that connection.

Next time I pick up an Us Weekly or check out EOnline, I don't think I'll feel such mixed emotions about it now.

Haircut? Maybe? We'll see.

I've been thinking of chopping off my hair, pretty much since the day I decided to grow it out. It's a frustrating thing, perhaps only understood by women. But I have special hair! No, really! I have very fine hair, but lots of it. Which in effect makes it feel thin because it gets weighed down fast and doesn't like to hold a curl. Add on to that a widows peak and it rules out a large amount of hairstyles I can even consider getting. I can't really part my hair from the side, because then it looks like I'm balding. Same reason for side bangs. (Which OHHH MAN I wanted so bad a few years back when EVERYONE had them). (Yes, I might jump off a bridge too).

My go to style is just...long. But it's not really a great style. It just allows me to throw it up in a bun or pony when I'm annoyed with it. It's not terrible either. It's just, well, no style. However, "society", aka "the man", aka "they" say that long hair is feminine and desired, which leads me to wonder, then short hair must not be? I don't really believe that. Contrary to what I said above, I'm not always a go with the masses kind of girl. I find short hair to be sassy and fun and it just screams confidence  I find tons of women to be beautiful with short hair. Look at Anne Hathaway, Michelle Williams or Natalie Portman. There's nothing to hide behind, people have to focus on you. Plus how awesome to not have to spend 45 minutes brushing, drying, straightening, only to have your hair flat and windblown and all sorts of yuck by the time you get your coffee at work? Okay, maybe that's just me. The point is, I don't think short hair means I will be less attractive.

So why do I hesitate cutting it all off? I HAVE NO CLUE. I dream about pixie haircuts, pause TV to study someone's hair, you should see my Google history. I ask friends, relatives, my poor husband, which one? This one? How about this one? No wait, I only have 43 more to show you...

I have a haircut next Monday. I mentioned at my last haircut in December that I might want to cut most of it off. My hairdresser was all for it and even said it'd make my hair look thicker (which fantastic, now I feel even more pressure to do it).

So I may do it. Or, I may chicken out and wait another 8 weeks to think about it. 

Either way, here is a before picture of my hair a little longer than it is now. We shall see what Monday brings.

Don't be fooled, hair may seem thicker than it appears.

Testing

So, a blog. Blawwwwwg. Attempt number, oh who has kept count? I've erased or hidden all my old, teenage angsty, complainy entries. I've gone through DiaryLand, LiveJournal, Xanga, WordPress, you name it. Let's give Blogger a try! I apparently want to keep beating a dead horse, you know? Giddy-up horse! Hmm, why won't you move horsey? Whyyy???

So, all good blogs, Google tells me, have a topic. A theme. Which I suppose is the reason I have had trouble keeping up with my own or finding something interesting to write. My life, doesn't seem so interesting. I don't have kids, I don't have any crazy hobbies. I'm not particularly crafty or artsy, although I desperately wish I could be. I'm also not a fancy writer either, so please don't let my overuse of commas and extra letters and made up words and run-on sentences fool you.

I just realized I was going to start my third paragraph with the word "so" again. SO!? You've got a problem with that? But really, a topic. I don't have one. I can't sum myself up like that. How about life? Can that be it? As boring as I am, I keep changing. I'd like to document that, in all it's boringness/awesomeness. If people can relate, fabulous. If not, well then this is no different from the rest. 

I do imagine you'll be seeing a lot of food, kitty, outdoor, travel, husband related items. I'm a high stress personality and I can worry about things for hours, so that ought to give me enough to write about.

So for a lovely start to this blog and end for this post I present 2 of my 3 kitties. 

Teepin kittehs are cute